Let's Get Anatomical
by Like 'Whoosh
Summary: Kenny's trying to win Kyle over with smarts, but it's not working out as planned. One-shot. K2. Rated T for suggestive themes.


**K2's cute too c:. Got a basic idea of this from Anatomy and Physiology class.**

**Oh, and this is boyXboy, so...beware.  
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**Warning: Possibility of lame and sucky writing. I might also make some present-tense or past-tense mistake. Sorry 'bout that. Uh, might be OOC. You decide.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own South Park or any of its content. Those stuff belong to Matt Stone and Trey Parker. I couldn't handle something that could get me killed (200, anyone?).  
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The textbooks were the reason Kenny McCormick chose to take Anatomy and Physiology Honors class junior year of high school. Sure, the hardcover books were gigantic and heavy, and had gross pictures of disgusting things that should not be shown to mankind (like baby fetuses, ugh), but there were some pages that, although they contributed to the book's weight, contained nice, legal pictures of naked women, boobs, jay-jay, and all, to balance the ratio. They were a gateway to access the boy's need of the sight during school hours. Photographed or illustrated, Kenny didn't mind. Boobs were boobs.

And, well, Kyle was Kyle, the nerdy Jew with a nice ass, which is really great to look at, by the way. Oh, and yet another reason Kenny sought out to study the subject. Yep, he actually studied Anatomy and Physiology. He had an interest in the red-headed Jew, and to impress someone of his species (teenage homo sapien of the twenty-first century, mind you), he had to use brains. Smarts were the key to the teenage-brainy-moral type, in Kenny's head, anyway. So when the blond found out his little crush wanted to take up A-and-P (it being an _honors_ class and everything), and the wondrous content inside its books, he circled the same four words on the form as he did, _Anatomy and Physiology Honors_. If he could not get his Jew, the naked boobs would compensate for his loss. They were something to fall back on. He would wallow in cat pee and gorge himself in ice cream while flipping through the free but bound nude ladies if Kyle's heart - and brain - were not won over. He didn't want to do that. Really, he didn't.

That was why he was going to try his best and blow away Kyle with his awesome, metaphorical smarts.

**.:~~:.**

There he was. The Jew was in the poorman's sight, walking around the school hallways with his nose in a book, successfully avoiding bumping into any student bodies without having to lift his eyes from the pages he made seem oh-so-interesting.

"Agh! Kenny!" That was when said guy had his surprised (and angered) target backed up against a wall, the target's reading dropping in the process.

"Nice to see you too, Kyle." Kenny pressed the palm of this right hand adjacent to the surface on the left side of Kyle's head and cleared his throat. It was pick-up line time, metaphorical-analogy style.

He put on a sly smirk and leaned close into Kyle's face, all the while saying, "You are the piloerector to my pilus."

Huh. The redhead didn't react how he thought he would've. No blushing red face or blubbering of random words that didn't make any sense. Just some weird look on his face and a raise of the eyebrow accompanied with "What are you talking about, Kenny? That doesn't even make any sense." Kenny moved away from his friend in confusion, giving him space to walk past his puzzled self and pick up his book from tiled floors.

"Ugh, you're lucky it's not a paperback book." Kyle dusted off the cover for any remaining specs of dust.

"_Why didn't it work?," _Kenny asked himself mentally, and started counting fingers. He locked his eyes with his; he put on a pervy, suggestive smile; he used a low, husky - not to mention, _suave_ - voice; his position was slick as slick could be; and he certainly _did not _mess up the line. It was perfect. Everything was there. Except… Except maybe Kyle wasn't.

"You really need to study more. It's not just some class to laugh about the way the body works." The nerd ranted on as he met back with the boy on welfare.

Kenny looked back at Kyle and concluded that maybe the line just wasn't that obvious as he thought it was. Oh well, it was time to ditch 'Plan A: Show Off Smarts' and move onto something else. Huh, that could work... "Well, then maybe you can tutor me."

"Just don't fool around."

"Then it's a study date."

"Wait, what!"

Kenny winked suggestively at his newly appointed tutor before he ran out of the halls, shouting, "We're starting with body parts! And, just so you know, I'm a kinesthetic learner! Get ready for some hands-on teaching, Mr. Kyle!"

The blond took one last glance at the red-faced, nonsense-blubbering Kyle and smirked to himself. He had the nerd in the book bag.

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**Oh, man, is it over? Heh, huh, hum. -cough- Well, uh, I'm too scared to re-read this because, when I do, I tend to feel nervous about my writing and second-guess myself. So please excuse my dear Aunt Sally. Hopefully I did this pairing justice. First-ever homo pairing and cartoon category fanfic I posted c:. Whoo, that's something. Oh, and cheesy lame last line. Ugh. Is it okay?**

**I was also debating on whether to use Mr. Kyle or Mr. Broflovski, but Broflovski could suggest Gerald, and...that's just plain weird (maybe even creepy) :I.  
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**Uh, **_**pilus**_** is another term for a hair while a **_**piloerector muscle**_** is a bunch of smooth muscle cells that make a pilus stand on end, like, straight up. Uh, vertically, and stuff…when you get cold or have goosebumps and… I suck at explaining. (Search engines are always an option...). But do you get the weird innuendo now :D? (Ugh, I fail at making up stuff orz… I don't even think it actually is anything close to an innuendo now that I think about it -A-. I'm sorry for making you say such a lame line, Kenny ;-;)**

**Got the idea after reading from the hair section in my A-and-P textbook (which really is heavy). My immature, late-blooming adolescent mind was on at the time (triggered by the word 'piloerector' xb). Goodness, how juvenile and sophisticated of me.**

**Ha… Hrm. Sorry, I'm weird. Thanks for reading :o.**

**-Like 'Whoosh (10.03.10)**

**_Is overwhelmed… and wants a Little Box of Butters D;. Fall break sucks leaves._**

**EDIT (11.23.10):Now that I think about it... The line is more of an analogy. Replaced the word "innuendo" with "analogy." Sorry for the misunderstanding xP.**_**  
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